


ethereal

by dianna44



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-02
Updated: 2017-01-02
Packaged: 2018-09-14 02:43:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9155101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dianna44/pseuds/dianna44
Summary: realizations





	

**Author's Note:**

> I just sat down and wrote this.

With the unsettling fright and nerves came the comforting shoulder to cry on and the warmth from a hand he never thought he’d be seeking. Yuuri hasn’t enjoyed dealing with feelings such as these before, and he doesn’t know what to define it as.

Victor is gorgeous, his smile blindingly bright and his view of the world and of Yuuri himself endlessly hopeful.

He makes Yuuri feel so incredibly elated, so incredibly comfortable, so incredibly wonderful, and Victor perhaps isn’t even aware of it.

Victor’s holding his hand. Yuuri isn’t sure if he knows he’s doing it. They had been finally settling into the couch, after a long practice, and Yuuri somehow found his hand being grasped by Victor's. Victor makes him feel emotions Yuuri is unable to describe, and Yuuri isn’t usually one to be brave, to make the first move, to stand strong, but Victor makes him feel like he could do all of that and more, so it’s him that speaks first.

“There’s… there’s a lot here, isn’t there?” Yuuri says, and Victor squeezes his hand, looking at him, blue eyes alight. “Us. Between us, I mean.”

Yuuri can see himself, in the past maybe, running away from such a statement, or quickly covering it up with an excuse, but he can’t do that now. He can’t do that. He said it, and he wanted to say it, and he wants to hear what Victor says in response. He wants to know if he’s going into this alone. He needs to know if he needs to run away or not.

(A large part of Yuuri, the part that’s usually enveloped by his insecurities and doubts, knows what Victor will say, knows that Victor feels it, knows that Victor is in lo—)

“There is,” Victor muses. He brings up his hand to lightly trace at Yuuri’s lips, and Yuuri’s breath catches. His breath catches, and Yuuri briefly thinks that maybe Victor will catch it in the future.

“What does it mean, Victor?” he asks, keeping his gaze focused on Victor. He can’t allow himself to be distracted by anything. Victor pulls his hand back, that small, musing smile still on his face, and simply stares at Yuuri.

“I don’t know, Yuuri,” Victor finally admits. His gaze starts to slip away then, but Yuuri can’t allow that. He can’t allow for distractions, he’d already decided.

Yuuri’s hand comes up and he grasps onto Victor’s chin, pulling his gaze back to him. Victor looks startled, but he still immediately leans into Yuuri, and Yuuri swears he can hear the crashing of oceans’ waves in their heartbeats.

“I think you do know,” Yuuri whispers. “I think you do know because I think I know, and it’s scary, isn’t it, Victor?” Yuuri is scared. He’s never felt such emotions where he can’t even _describe_ it before, and that’s scary to him, but it’s such a good thrill, such a wondrous adventure he could have, such an aspiring concept to reach for.

Victor doesn’t say anything for a long while, and Yuuri allows his fingers to lightly sweep across Victor’s lips, his nose, his eyelids, every feature of his face, and Victor’s breathing is soft, so soft and it’s wavering. Beauty is something that Yuuri has always liked to appreciate, and not in a shallow sort of way, but in the way he looks at art. Art can be so beautiful, and sometimes when looking at it, trying to find out its many mysteries, Yuuri wonders how something like it could exist, and he knows that nothing could exist as it does anywhere else. It’s the same feeling when he looks at Victor, but when he feels the way Victor feels underneath his fingertips, it’s something so much _more_ , and Yuuri thinks that there should museums, planets, galaxies, and universes dedicated to even _try_ to portray the kind of beauty Yuuri sees and feels when he experiences moments with Victor.

“I like being with you,” Victor eventually breathes, and it’s such a simple phrasing, such a simple way of putting what they have together, but Yuuri still knows that it’s _enough._ It’s enough because it’s true, and Yuuri’s hand is in Victor’s hair now, and Yuuri smiles, smiles that bright, blinding smile Victor has complimented him on many times now.

“I like being with you,” Yuuri says back, and Victor smiles, and their bodies are leaning towards each other, and their breaths are seemingly melding together, and their heartbeats are slowly in time with each other, much like a song, maybe one to be heard on the first day of spring, of summer, of autumn, perhaps even winter, and together they can feel it, they feel those emotions that don’t have words, and it’s _enough_.

And on one hand, nothing really changed. Nothing really changed at all, both still with the same emotions and feelings for the other, and still in the same place, together on a couch.

On the other hand, however, everything changed. Everything changed, and with that clarification of the _something_ between the two of them, their universe shifted just a bit, allowing for more rays of starlight to shine down between them, on them, around them, and for that one moment, even happiness dulled in comparison. 

**Author's Note:**

> happy new year xxxx


End file.
